Loss of my lovely dad and my writing

My dad and a difficult year

This last year has been hard, hopefully early next year the world will be vaccinated and we will be no longer live in fear of catching Covid-19. The writing achievements I have made have been with a muddled head.  Struggling on through, this has not been a good year. Losing my dad last month to Pancreatic Cancer I am heartbroken, he died three and a half months after diagnosis. He was a young and fit man; it really isn’t fair!

Trying to carry on, I continue to watch out for my family and encourage and support their schoolwork.  This last weekend I re-learned long multiplication from a ‘You-Tube’ video.  This week I was told that my son is a good mathematician, he has his Grandfather’s brain, not mine as maths is my worst subject.

With Netflix taking over my evenings, I’ve just worked my way through ‘The Crown’. Tonight, I’m watching ‘Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency’. With a head full of grief procrastination is working well for me.  This last weekend, myself and my daughter contributed towards a video highlighting the shielding community during COVID- 19.  We both destroyed ‘A Million Dreams’ from ‘The Greatest Showman’.  I will put a link on my blog when it is on ‘You Tube’.

I’ve been trying to keep up to date on my blogs but I’m not doing a great job at this one. My participation in sharing forums has stopped. How do I get out of my funk?

December

So, when the world is discussing Christmas, I’m thinking about my dad and his funeral today. Friends are already putting up their Christmas trees, I could easily leave ours in the loft this year and cancel Christmas.  However, with two young children I can’t do this.  I have to put on a brave face, try and smile and carry on. I’m not in any mood to send cards, wrapping the presents will be hard enough.

Coping with grief

I’m trying to keep busy, but my head is all over the place.  Focusing on my children and husband is helping me. Remembering happier times makes me cry, I’m not sure how to think of happy times and not get upset. Losing someone special hurts more than words, a pain that only someone who has lost a parent can understand.

I have December short stories that I need to focus on, how do I achieve this?

With determination and taking a day at a time, hopefully I will get there.  Dads funeral was the first family occasion where I couldn’t hug him.  Due to COVID– 19 guests were limited, so many wanted to attend but couldn’t.

Writing achievements

This year despite everything I had my paranormal story published by ‘Writers Unite’ in their ‘Dimensions of Paranormal Anthology’.

I was a contributing author in Marjorie Mallon’s, ‘This is Lockdown’.

My reflective COVID – 19 story, set next year, has just been published in a charity book raising money for ‘NHS charities together’ – ‘Living during the Coronavirus Pandemic’.

I have submitted a western story to ‘Writers Unite’ for ‘Dimensions of the Wild West Anthology’ being published next year.

Here is a post with the Amazon Links – A different world and our changed lives

Plans for next year – 2021

I hope to write a fantasy story for another ‘Writers Unite’ Anthology, alongside writing both my blogs.  I intend to continue with Blog Battle and ‘Writers Unite’ monthly writing prompts and I would also like to get my time tunnel novel finished.  I’ve hardly touched it this year and I need to continue working on it.

I hope that we are able to relax more next year. If the whole world accepted the vaccine and followed social distancing advice then maybe we could return to some normality.  The amount of people on social media stating they are not having it worries me.  Till the world has achieved some immunity we will need to continue to be careful.

Can next year be any worse than 2020?

My dad left these words in his Eulogy, which he started to write himself.  When asked at a young age what he wanted to be, his answer was someone’s daddy.  He certainly achieved this with three daughters who loved him dearly.  Then he wrote his parting words, quoting Robert Falcon Scott, “Make our boy interested in natural history if you can. Keep him in the open air. Above all, you must guard him from indolence. Make him a strenuous man. The great god has called me. Take comfort in that I die in peace with the world and myself and I am not afraid.”

These are great words and my mission now is to try and get the children outside more and I have a new word – Indolence.

I thought in June that 2020 couldn’t get worse and then my wonderful dad died.  After this awful year we all need 2021 to be happier and I really do hope it is.

For more see, October – my writing and the year 2020