Life and change

Here we are finally in 2021, but will this year be any easier? I’m not sure.  2020 ended very badly for me, change is happening and losing my dad means Christmas will never be the same.

Here we are in January and my children are attending school, but weekends I’m doing extra home-schooling.  Teachers are working their hardest to teach the children but issues with social distancing make it difficult.

I’m thanking ‘You Tube’ for help with long multiplication. My son is only nine but home-schooling means I am learning too. Through life I’m sure we all have regrets, one of mine is not working harder at school, I found it difficult, so hated it. I remember guessing answers rather than asking for help. I don’t want my children to make the same mistake. Yes, he is protesting but he is doing very well. Computer games do not help with home-schooling, I do understand, multiplication or ‘Roblox’. At nine I would have preferred ‘Roblox’ too.

With continuing fears of COVID – 19, the worry continues. The country is now being vaccinated but the amount of people dying is still high. We need some good news but everyday there seems to be something else.

My writing

The stress and upset of last year is continuing into this year.  I’ve realised, that change can happen in an instant.  One moment you think things are going to be alright and then the phone rings and you are hurt again.  We can only live a day at a time and we must make the most of it.  Some friends will stay with us but others will walk away.  At a time when I need support, friends or really not friends have walked away.  It hurts but we can’t do anything about those that give up on us, especially when we are already struggling with life.

This year I am aiming to get my book finished.  The first draft is written but it needs a rewrite, I’ve been advised to make it humorous.  I’m not a natural comedian so I’m not sure how my time travel novel will look and read in a funny style.

My reading

Last year I was doing great with my reading until August when my dad became unwell.  My reading slowed down and in November stopped. He’s only been gone two months, I think of him everyday, and cry most days. Keeping focused is hard but I need to be strong and accept change.  It still doesn’t feel right that he has gone .  They say time is a healer, I don’t think this will get easier, nothing will bring him back to me.

This year I have so far read ‘The Beast of Buckingham Palace’ by ‘David Walliams’ to my seven year old.  It is actually very good and worth reading.  My daughter and I have been laughing through it.

I need to start rebuilding the books in my ‘Goodreads’ account again.

Plans for 2021

I hope to finally get my book finished and I hope to submit work to more publications. I’ve read we need to aim for hundred rejections on the premise that some could be acceptances.

I aim to read more than last year, the greater problem will be staying focused.

I need to reduce the time I spend on Netflix.  Last night at 1.30am I was sat watching season 5 of Lucifer. I must go to bed earlier, too many late nights.

I really hope that the extreme fears of COVID-19 go away as more are vaccinated, and there are no more lockdowns.  We all need this year to be better than the last.

I intend to keep doing extra school work with the children.  A week ago I purchased  Night Zookeeper  (please note this is a referral link and both of us will receive £5.00 if purchased).  Night Zookeeper helps them with their writing and spelling. It looks good and is worth looking at if you are home-schooling.

A positive outlook

We are in a better position this year then we were last year. Life needs to get better but it will still take time.  I need to be more grateful for my alone time, my days are full of working, teaching and supporting my children.  Writing and reading fit in around everything else.

Lockdown has brought quality family time, however it feels unbelievable that we haven’t walked to the city shops and bought doughnuts for a year. Things we took for granted are closed from us.  We need to remember we are a year closer to being able to safely get back to normal life again.

So, how is life with you?

For more see Loss of my lovely dad and my writing

My dad and a difficult year

This last year has been hard, hopefully early next year the world will be vaccinated and we will be no longer live in fear of catching Covid-19. The writing achievements I have made have been with a muddled head.  Struggling on through, this has not been a good year. Losing my dad last month to Pancreatic Cancer I am heartbroken, he died three and a half months after diagnosis. He was a young and fit man; it really isn’t fair!

Trying to carry on, I continue to watch out for my family and encourage and support their schoolwork.  This last weekend I re-learned long multiplication from a ‘You-Tube’ video.  This week I was told that my son is a good mathematician, he has his Grandfather’s brain, not mine as maths is my worst subject.

With Netflix taking over my evenings, I’ve just worked my way through ‘The Crown’. Tonight, I’m watching ‘Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency’. With a head full of grief procrastination is working well for me.  This last weekend, myself and my daughter contributed towards a video highlighting the shielding community during COVID- 19.  We both destroyed ‘A Million Dreams’ from ‘The Greatest Showman’.  I will put a link on my blog when it is on ‘You Tube’.

I’ve been trying to keep up to date on my blogs but I’m not doing a great job at this one. My participation in sharing forums has stopped. How do I get out of my funk?

December

So, when the world is discussing Christmas, I’m thinking about my dad and his funeral today. Friends are already putting up their Christmas trees, I could easily leave ours in the loft this year and cancel Christmas.  However, with two young children I can’t do this.  I have to put on a brave face, try and smile and carry on. I’m not in any mood to send cards, wrapping the presents will be hard enough.

Coping with grief

I’m trying to keep busy, but my head is all over the place.  Focusing on my children and husband is helping me. Remembering happier times makes me cry, I’m not sure how to think of happy times and not get upset. Losing someone special hurts more than words, a pain that only someone who has lost a parent can understand.

I have December short stories that I need to focus on, how do I achieve this?

With determination and taking a day at a time, hopefully I will get there.  Dads funeral was the first family occasion where I couldn’t hug him.  Due to COVID– 19 guests were limited, so many wanted to attend but couldn’t.

Writing achievements

This year despite everything I had my paranormal story published by ‘Writers Unite’ in their ‘Dimensions of Paranormal Anthology’.

I was a contributing author in Marjorie Mallon’s, ‘This is Lockdown’.

My reflective COVID – 19 story, set next year, has just been published in a charity book raising money for ‘NHS charities together’ – ‘Living during the Coronavirus Pandemic’.

I have submitted a western story to ‘Writers Unite’ for ‘Dimensions of the Wild West Anthology’ being published next year.

Here is a post with the Amazon Links – A different world and our changed lives

Plans for next year – 2021

I hope to write a fantasy story for another ‘Writers Unite’ Anthology, alongside writing both my blogs.  I intend to continue with Blog Battle and ‘Writers Unite’ monthly writing prompts and I would also like to get my time tunnel novel finished.  I’ve hardly touched it this year and I need to continue working on it.

I hope that we are able to relax more next year. If the whole world accepted the vaccine and followed social distancing advice then maybe we could return to some normality.  The amount of people on social media stating they are not having it worries me.  Till the world has achieved some immunity we will need to continue to be careful.

Can next year be any worse than 2020?

My dad left these words in his Eulogy, which he started to write himself.  When asked at a young age what he wanted to be, his answer was someone’s daddy.  He certainly achieved this with three daughters who loved him dearly.  Then he wrote his parting words, quoting Robert Falcon Scott, “Make our boy interested in natural history if you can. Keep him in the open air. Above all, you must guard him from indolence. Make him a strenuous man. The great god has called me. Take comfort in that I die in peace with the world and myself and I am not afraid.”

These are great words and my mission now is to try and get the children outside more and I have a new word – Indolence.

I thought in June that 2020 couldn’t get worse and then my wonderful dad died.  After this awful year we all need 2021 to be happier and I really do hope it is.

For more see, October – my writing and the year 2020

October 2020

As October and 2020 passes by I’m becoming more negative.  Being positive and practicing mindfulness are important, but this is not easy.   We have to be realistic, it has been a tough year and it has affected people in different ways.  From those still refusing to go outside and / or quitting jobs that they once loved.  To those happy to return to the gym, go to the pub and though social distancing, get on with life.  A year ago we never imagined that our lives would look like this today.

How do we go forward?

My nine-year-old is going through a tough time at the moment and has been advised to record three good positive things that have happened during the day.  This is good advice and helps to stop us dwelling on the bad.  So much happens to us in our lives sometimes seeing the good is often difficult.

Walking is excellent for clearing the mind.  I enjoy walking the children to school and walking to collect them.  It gives me time to reflect and de-stress from whatever is happening during the day.  It also earns me steps on my fit-bit fitness tracker.  On a school day I easily walk over 10 000 steps, some days more 15 000 steps.  Today, school holidays I’ve managed less than 5000., not so good. Yes, I need to add a walk into my daily schedule and create myself a reason for doing it.  Exercise is important to our well-being.

My writing

I’ve been updating my other blog, Justmuddlingthroughlife regularly, and have now completed writing my submission for the Writers Unite! Western Anthology.

On Friday 30^th October my Paranormal short story was published in the Writers Unite Paranormal Anthology.  I am excited to see my work amongst other excellent fiction writers.  Unlike the writing on my blogs both Anthology submissions have taken hours of work – feedback and support from my writing group and many drafts.

After a break from my time tunnels novel, I have now started re drafting the beginning.  At 71000 words in raw first draft, I have a long way to go, but I have not given up on it.

Facebook

Here is my September – Facebook Live

Writing projects

With the children returning to school on Tuesday, life should be getting back to normal. However, in the UK we are now entering into a month’s lockdown as from Thursday. What does this mean? Children and teachers will still be going to school. People are already panic buying.  I did a small shop this week and am now wondering whether I should be stocking up more.

My next post for www.justmuddlingthroughlife.co.uk is my November, Ruby and Freda story.  December will possibly be the concluding part and I’m wondering what is going to happen.  Will Freda find love?  Has Ruby found true love with Mark?  What about Ruby’s singing career?  And what happens to Rosie?

I intend to continue redrafting my novel, my long work in progress.

Life and Halloween

Life continues with all the complications of family life.  The children seemed to have a lot of homework this week, I guess not helped by so many months not attending school.  We have completed the maths just English to finish.

Today is 31st October, Halloween, but this year is different.  There are no trick or treaters but we are still all carving pumpkins.  Something we can do despite COVID 19.  Tonight my daughter found an incense tea light.  We put it inside her pumpkin and lit it, a fresh sweet smelling pumpkin.

So, how is life with you? and how are your writing projects going?

For more see, Hot weather, lockdown, family and writing

and A different world and our changed lives